Alex claims she'll have BIG news this week

ANNOUNCEMENT: Alex Mccord claims in her latest blog following RHONJ she will have big news later this week... we'll be keeping our eyes peeled!

RHONJ take over My Big Fat Gay Italian Wedding

I really wanna see this-- the RHONJ are going to star for 4 days (9/1-9/4) in the Dina Manzo produced MY BIG FAT GAY ITALIAN WEDDING. This show is currently running in NYC Off-Broadway. Here is a preview video for this special engagement: Italian Wedding RHONJ

Some Funny Kids Parody RHONJ

LMAO Watch Here: RHONJ Kids Parody

Live Episode Blogging!

Hi everyone... it's MP, ready to live blog this episode. After last week's NJ episode, who isn't ready for this week's show? Here we go!!

Scene 1: Teresa, who looks fairly pretty in person (saw her in Hamilton the other day), is in her foreclosed home. Damn, Joe's JUICY. Gia is dressed ridiculously in this episode. Way to get her fighting early with classes, T! I've always liked Gia, I think she's adorable. Joe might need this workout more than the girls, though. In the words of the Real Mr. Housewife, "just sayin'". Haha, I love how the prize for beating up your sibling in this family is a hot dog... I guess that's why Teresa was so horny after flipping the table at Danielle.

Scene 2: Danielle boxing in front of her children! I took a boxing class this week, and this one doesn't seem to be so rough. Really? Punching the faces of Jacqueline and Teresa? Way to set a great example. I do agree that Danielle was the victim last week. I'd pay a good dollar to see Danielle face either of them in the ring. "It only takes one good smack to the head to make a person never walk again." Loves it!

Scene 3: Great, we are at the snake's house (Kim G... called the snake from here on out). Snake's house is huge. Who is the WE that the snake is talking about? She's not a part of this cast and I hope it never happens. At least snake is somewhat taking Danielle's side and understanding that Teresa wasn't right with calling Danielle a bitch. This scene is almost making the snake a bit more endearing... maybe she's more worm-like, than snake-like.

Scene 4: I bet Caroline's breakfast's are delicious. Poor Albie for feeling like a failure. I think the whole law school situation that he's in sucks, though I don't think he should look at the Brownstone as a failure... it's a temporary stop on the way to a new school. Loves Carolin'e monkey shirt!

Scene 5: Here we are at the other snake's store, Posche. Yes, Teresa, your actions were wonderfully acceptable because it was after the event. And your "hello" wasn't sincere, nor did you expect it to go well. Come off it. TERESA, your house IS IN FORECLOSURE! It's been reported multiple times by the Real Mr. Housewife. There's the other snake. She looks like Minnie Mouse with that thing on her head. Juicy is gorgeous? I'm hungry for a hot dog. OMG I LOVE TERESA CALLING KIM G ELDERLY. She's sort of off my shit list for that!

Scene 6: Ashley hasn't really learned her lesson. She's STILL talking shit all over the internet about Danielle. There were drawings of Danielle and she's bad-mouthing her all over twitter too. I have zero respect for Ashley.

WHOA-- the Real Mr. Housewife is working on a big scoop!

Scene 7: Joe owns a pizza shop now? But Teresa didn't know when it was going to open? At least Joe admits that they're going to get kicked out of their house. Someone call the Health Department-- Teresa wants to do it in the pizzeria.

Scene 8: Danielle hangs with the best crowd, doesn't she? And she's still talking about this to other people? I wonder what Danielle was doing when she was 19. Danielle owns her own tanning room? K-ah-ma, as Danielle calls it, is indeed a big bitch.

Scene 9: Albie has news... a letter saying he can complete law school! GOOD FOR HIM!!! Caroline couldn't figure out what this means on their own? Why do they look so unhappy? There's a smile! :) Anyone know what school he got kicked out of? Seton Hall? That's just an inference using my immense knowledge of geography. Oh no! A Manzo moves out? HORROR!

COMMERCIAL FOR NEXT WEEK: Ashley continues being a bitch.

Scene 10: I'd love to catch myself a slice there! :)

Scene 11: To those who balk at Danielle's looks, let me tell you this... she was BEAUTIFUL in person. I'm glad that they're going to file these papers. The elderly snake seems to be on Danielle's side. Who are these people? Larry, Curly, and Moe. I don't recall seeing them at all.

Scene 12: Jacqueline looks like a shell of her old-self. Much darker, less happy. That's the problem with this show. These women need to get together and have fun occasionally. It's all too serious this year. I hope Caroline gives Ashley a whooping! Go Aunt Caroline, whoop her! Jacqueline just said that her daughter is unstoppable... I know some CHILDREN who are like that.

Scene 13: They're just leaving now? It's nighttime! Larry, Curly, and Moe look tired. The State of NJ vs. Ashley Holmes. Loves it! Danielle is a very well-spoken woman.

REAL HOUSEWIVES OF DC! It cannot come soon enough! August 5! :)

Scene 14: The snake runs? Interesting. Loves Jacqueline calling her a BUSTED UP SEX AND THE CITY! hahahahaha. How does Danielle's problems twenty five years ago have anything to do with the current affairs. The snake is incredibly two-faced. This is going to blow up in her face and it's going to not be pretty. She is NOT being a friend to either of them. Snake. Hsss. Snake.

Less drama than last week, but still fun. Enjoy Danielle on WWH!

Sorry

Sorry the last few days have been busy... We're doing some updates and LIVE blogging tonight with a special guest blogger... Stay tuned!

Chelsea Lately Parodies NJ Housewives

See the video here: RHONJ Chelsea Lately Parody

Danielle Claims She's A Member Of The Gay Community

Read about it on none other than Fox News here: Danielle Claims To Be A Member of Gay Community

Teresa Shows Off Bikini Bod

Teresa shows off her Bikini bod and answers some questions here: Teresa Bikini Bod

Kim G Talks a LOT of SHIT

Yet another article on Kim G here: Kim G Talks Smack

IN this interview, she reveals:

* She believes Danielle is devious, calculating, and dangerous.

* She currently has no relationship with Danielle Staub.

* She loves Jacqueline.

* Dina feels she is just creating drama to get on camera.

* The Housewife she liked least was Dina.

* She claims Danielle "thinks she died and went to heaven and everyone came to take care of her" by the way she treats the Bravo crew, asking them to take her bags out, etc.

AND MORE!!

Kim G Shoots The Shit

A very interesting article on everyone's favorite new NJ backstabber, Kim G: Kim G

In this article she reveals:

* Her and Kim D are sister in laws

* She thinks she would "annihilate Elvira in every way" as a contender for the new, replacement housewife

* She was interviewed to be on the show before but turned it down because of a boyfriend she was involved with and did not want filmed

* She doesn't really care what people have to say about her

AND MORE.

Episode 9- Blogging!

Here we go...

Scene 1: I enjoyed seeing Caroline's sisters. Cookie, Caroline's oldest sister, is very pretty for her age. I thought it was funny that Caroline thought Frannie and her had identical faces in the past- I certainly don't see that. I do believe Caroline is a good mother who really cares for her kids and I believe her emotions about her kids are real.

Scene 2: I don't particularly understand why Teresa and Jacqueline are interested in being friends with Kim D if they claim they want nothing to do with Danielle. For two women who don't want anything to do with her, they seem to have nothing better to do in their lives than meet with people and talk with them about her. Teresa actually asked a good question when she asked Kim D how she can be sure she's not talking about her also. I also find it interesting that Kim D says she's just an acquaintance with Danielle but then tells the girls she's invited to her party. Shady, shady Kim D. I also think Jacqueline's comment was dumb about how "Danielle claims she's in this love and light thing but then she goes and calls the cops on my daughter." How is Danielle calling the cops on your daughter not living in love and light IF Ashley sent Danielle those messages? Just wondering. At least Jacqueline was a little skeptical about going... that showed some semblance of a brain.

Scene 3: I found this scene borderline disturbing. Who are the 16 people that ALL texted Danielle to tell her this? Hopefully better friends to her than Kim D has been. I found it weird for Danielle to say to her daughter "Mommy's got a little situation here." I mean, I do think I would have called Kim D out on this to if I was Danielle but I may have approached it in a different manner.

Scene 4:I do think Danielle sounded a little too angry at Kim D just for paying her water bill; however, the girl at the desk did seem a little rude and Kim D is a total fake friend to D so that's annoying and I can understand why Danielle would be upset. I LOVED when Danielle said Kim D is "absolutely, positively playing me for the last time." Danielle is a smart woman. I do think Danielle should have just told Kim D what was reallt on her mind rather than starting an issue over Posche. I do agree with what Danielle said, though- a friend of hers would have let her know she was going to hang out with those women.

Scene 5: I found this scene ridiculous. To quote Bethenny, Caroline needs to get a hobby. She should maybe volunteer some time at her sister Dina's foundation or do something else that's productive besides sitting home and wallowing at her "being alone." I also thought it was ridiculous for Caroline to tell Al to retire... he has an amazing business. Why should he retire? So he can sit with her and eat? Ridiculous.

Scene 6: My first thought when Ashley entered Posche was WHY?! This girl is an 18 year old brat who NEEDS to stop getting involved in the drama. It's not like she has her own money to go shop in Posche so the ONLY reason she could possibly go there would be to stir the pot... and it's a pot that she doesn't belong in. Ashley did look good in the dress... I'll say that much.

Scene 7: I found Teresa and Jacqueline's workout laughable. Nether of these women need to lose that much weight... and Dina even said in her tweets last night that they were doing more talking than working out since she walked in on this scene.

Scene 8: I vote Kim D was either STILL attempting to play the fence OR was actually scared of Danielle being mad at her. I still don't understand why Danielle would want to rebuild a relationship with Kim D after she was befriending Danielle's enemies. It doesn't make sense. I don't understand Danielle's comment about how just because this is in Wayne- her hometown- no one would hurt her... doesn't make sense.

Scene 9: Why must these women who don't want anything to do with Danielle or talk about Danielle- or so they claim- invite Caroline over to discuss Danielle going to the fashion show event? I did agree with Caroline that Danielle shouldn't stop someone from going anywhere or living their life.

Scene 10: Why does Kim G have her own driver? She must be really rich. It still doesn't take away from her two-faced, bitch self. I do agree with what Danielle said- if Teresa attacks her, she SHOULD attack back. I actually think Kim G's logic was good here even though she really is a horrible friend to Danielle.

Scene 11: Ashley looked pretty once she got all done up. I don't understand Jacqueline saying she was excited for this night when she knew there would likely be some sort of drama or even a run=in with Danielle. It's ridiculous that Kim D calls Danielle "the big D" since SHE is the one that invited her... Like, get serious woman! I love Teresa asking if Kim will say hello... so stupid and immature. I loved Danielle bringing a bodyguard, though I'm not sure why she felt the need to.

Scene 11-2: I still can't believe that Kim D had the AUDACITY to sit Teresa and Jacqueline at her table and put it directly across from Danielle's table. That is just trying to start drama. I do agree with what Danielle said about Teresa and Jacqueline's desperation. I also agreed with Danielle saying a real friend of her would NEVER break bread with the likes of them.

Scene 12: BORING! I don't need to see Caroline whining anymore. It's annoying.

Scene 13: Yes! Back to the good stuff. I didn't think Danielle's diss was THAT offensive. I mean, picking up the phone is rude, but... there were ruder, worse things she could have done. Every time Teresa said she liked something I kept thinking "It's not like you can afford anything Ms. Bankruptcy!" I did think it was inappropriate of Danielle to say "coke whore" when Ashley was on stage. I do agree with Danielle for saying Kim is a piece of shit... that's true. Teresa sounded retarded by saying her table was definitely "the cool girls." Seriously, are you twelve years old? Get over yourself! Ashley definitely was staring down Danielle... ridiculous! STOP GETTING INVOLVED IN DRAMA THAT DOESN'T CONCERN YOU. YOU ARE A CHILD. I do agree with Danielle's comment about Jacqueline's parenting; it is HORRIBLE. I don't know WHY Teresa wanted to say hi to Danielle. That could only start drama. I thought Danielle did say hello nicely, albeit coldly. She doesn't owe Teresa anything. I don't know why Danielle said don't call me honey- HOWEVER- DAMN did Teresa get CRAZY when Danielle said that... I HATED that this had to be the last minute of the episode and am DYING for next week's (airing July 12th, not 5th b/c of the holiday) episode where we will likely see Ashley get arrested and either someone with a knife or a 9mm... cannot wait!!!

Until next time... I'm just sayin!

Teresa's Party Planner Elvira Also Broke

Breaking News via Perez Hilton: Elvira Broke

Episode 8- Blogging!

For the first time, The Real Mr. Housewife is blogging about an episode (a tradition I hope will be weekly)... I know initially I promised NOT to give opinions, but when blogging the Episodes I will have to... So here goes, Episode 8: "Bubbies Gone Bad":


The first scene (in the restaurant) has me wondering a few things initially. One- why is Teresa always late? Can this woman not make it anywhere on time? Maybe she's busy trying to deal with her debt? Just sayin'. Also, why does Caroline say that there's someone missing... Dina is her sister and Jacqueline's sister-in-law AND Teresa's friend- it's not like they can't see her off the show. This just seems like a moment meant for drama and acting. Also, Caroline insists "You can't deal with someone as irrational as her"- where is the irrationality in what Danielle has done? Also, when Teresa says "Try me bitch"... I dunno, Teresa. I'm pretty sure Danielle could take you Just sayin'.

I was shocked when Danielle showed her breasts and they were just a little blurred out. I want to say kudos to her for dealing with the issue of plastic surgery gone wrong and trying to improve it on national TV. Also, I give her credit for not trying to hide the fact that she's had work done. In a world where people lie about their plastic surgery, I give Danielle credit for being open about it.

While I understand that Lauren is Caroline's daughter, I didn't realize she was a Housewife... Oh, wait- she's not! So, no offense Bravo, but please stop wasting camera time with watching Lauren do makeup. BORING. Yawn. BORING... ZzzzzZzzzZzzzz... I also like that Caroline says here that her children are established on where they want their lives to go...

While I'm not a parent, I do have to say I give credit to Jacqueline for throwing Ashley out the previous week. The only mistake she made is that this needed to happen a LONG time ago. That kid needed a good kick in the ass last season, not a new car for flunking out of school. Is it just me or when Ashley says she's embarrassed by how she acted while smiling, does it seem a bit forced? To me it seems like she's TOTALLY faking it for the cameras. Just sayin'.

This scene with Teresa and the party planner Elvira (who thought THIS episode would make her the new RHONJ) was funny. The reason it was so funny was because Teresa always needs to be right and Elvira seemed to have the personality to always need to be right, so seeing these two personalities clash was quite entertaining. Also, when she leaved and Teresa falls over dramatically... you can see where Gia gets her dramatics from.

Watching Chris give Ashley rules was interesting... we'll see if she's able to follow them. Based on her past behavior, I fully expect her to be breaking them and getting into fights with Jacqueline and Chris ASAP.

I found the scene between Caroline and Albie to be chock-full of real emotion. Caroline's parenting skills really did shine through and the fact that she REALLY cares about her children is so blatantly obvious. She also gave really sound advice to Albie... and the love and respect they have as a Mother/Son was definitely shown. I really felt for Albie in this scene as I know what it's like to screw up and need a second chance. However, one question- how if Albie only got one D+ was his GPA under a 2.00? A 2.00 is a C average- one D+ shouldn't bring that average THAT Much down unless all the other grades are bad- which they clearly were. Also, is it just me or does Albie seem to be going bald in the back a little bit? What a shame for someone so good looking.

Seeing Al Manzo again, I must give him a shout out for doing an AMAZING job at slimming down. He looks night and day different from last year, so kudos Al! Caroline saying "In this family we're warriors and Albie is a survivor" brought a slightly cynical smile to my face as it's almost as ridiculous as "My family is as thick as thieves." I thought Al made a really good point that "If this hurdle is enough to take him down, he doesn't deserve to be a lawyer then." Well stated and it was nice to see a parent not being completely biased toward their child.

Kim D makes me want to vomit. She's an annoying, two-faced bitch who reminds me of a prostitute in the sense that she'll tell you she loves you and fuck you just in order to get your money. Just sayin'. Also, this scene with them in Posche particularly annoyed me, as if Jacqueline and Teresa want NOTHING to do with Danielle, why keep talking about her? It doesn't make sense. I did think Teresa made a good point saying it's shady that Kim D went to Danielle's lunch when Kim D said she didn't want to be friends with her. Hmm... Teresa, you might be onto something- who looks like the pig now? Kim D.

Again, kudos to Danielle for showing her plastic surgery openly on TV. This takes a lot of courage to do in the first place (get it done), but then to show it on television is another thing entirely. I give her a LOT of credit for this.

I found it funny that Caroline pointed out that two girls came into the Brownstone to say that they thought Christopher was better looking than Albie. It was funny, especially because I don't think Christopher's really all that good looking and Albie definitely is. Albie acted kind of immaturely at this dinner, as it was about celebrating Lauren's achievements, not getting defensive because he failed out of law school. It was good to hear Caroline say Albie should do something instead of sitting around feeling sorry for himself- very true.

When Teresa met up with Elvira again, I was just sitting there in disbelief, especially with the current news regarding Teresa and Joe's bankruptcy. How the HELL do you spend this much on a party when you're already MEGA in debt? Just sayin'

Teresa's house warming party was QUITE the interesting event. I don't understand why Kim G would want to come if she wasn't invited initially... Obviously it was a last minute invite when she called... Of course, Kim G was clearly fishing for an invite by texting Jacqueline... I don't understand this Kim G woman whatsoever. Playing both sides of the field will only get you burned Kim G... keep that in mind. Kim G's only saving grace this season has been that her son is extremely cute. Other than that the woman doesn't have a single redeeming quality. I'd also prefer (from last week) if she NEVER attempts to get on a stripper pole again. It was... frightening.

Danielle's daughters seem to care about her a lot... and seeing them in person at one of Danielle's book signings they seem really proud of her and to love her a lot. It was nice to see them wanting to take care of her post-surgery.

I must say that when Jacqueline arrived at the party I was like WOW! She looks AMAZING! (not to mention AMAZINGLY thin!!!). When I saw Joe and Teresa getting ready for the party I was wondering where are Gia, Malania, and the other two? It was weird to me that if you had a new baby she'd be MIA just so you could have a party.

Kim D SERIOUSLY needs to control her drinking. Teresa was trying to make a speech and for the second time this season Kim D made a total ass out of herself. What's funny is these women call Danielle garbage but then hang out with people like Kim D. PUHLEEEZ. Also, Ashley drooling over the Juicy Joe made me wanna puke. The man is not juicy, he's fat. Fact not fiction here, people! LOVED Caroline's comment when watching Kim D that if this was one of her kids she would choke them! love love love that comment! Kim D approaching Ashley was totally inappropriate too. I was glad Caroline put them in check and was like "no more of this."

I love that Kim G approached Caroline to say Jacqueline is obsessed with Danielle. SO the other way. Two faced bitch. She should pick a team and stick to it, NOT play both sides.

That's about it for this week's episode. I cannot WAIT for next week's- Especially the "SOMEBODY HAS A KNIFE" part!

Until then... The Real Mr. Housewife is signing off.

People.Com Asking Who Should Replace Dina

People.com is asking you who should replace Dina- Ashley (wtf?), Kim D, Kim G, or Elvira? Read and vote here: Who should replace Dina?

Andy Cohen crushes "new RHONJ" rumor

Putting rumors to rest, Andy Cohen tweeted that Elvira Grau is NOT the new RHONJ and that she will not be replacing Dina Manzo.

Dina, Caroline, Jacqueline, and Teresa To Host Benefit

Dina is producing the Off-Broadway show MY BIG GAY ITALIAN WEDDING. Here and three of the other NJ Housewives will be appearing this Thursday for a benefit. If you buy tickets and use the code BGMENY99 at checkout you get 40.00 off.

Caroline Manzo to appear in Red Bank, NJ

NJ New Episode (without Dina!) tonight

Don't forget to tune in @ 10 PM on Bravo to the first RHONJ without Dina Manzo. After the show, Andy Cohen will have Danielle Staub on his show to sing her new song... should be a good night!

Caroline Decides To Keep Twitter and Facebook

Caroline Manzo has decided she will keep her facebook and twitter accounts... she claims someone gave out her cell phone number last night and she had to change it... she was upset and missed an important call... but now all is calm in the Manzo world.

Caroline Manzo to delete twitter and facebook?

According to her twitter, Caroline Manzo will be deleting her Facebook AND Twitter accounts tonight... Apparently, someone leaked her phone number. She thanks fans for respecting her wishes.